I am Attila from Transylvania, and I am an occultist and mixed esoteric artist. After 30 years of research, study, and practice, last year (2018) I created several esoteric Tarot decks and published a few. Probably I will publish more, not only esoteric Tarot decks but also books. I am not in competition with anyone but myself.
I could tell you stories about how I am the grand-grandson of Attila the Hun, the nephew of Dracula or Vlad the Impaler, but I will not. I am not selling fairytales, but an instrument of prediction and self-development, a tool which may help someone to learn things about the Universe and her or his personality. Tarot is not only an instrument of prediction, divination and fortune-telling but also a vehicle of preserving and transmitting knowledge. Knowing yourself is knowing the Universe, knowing the Universe is knowing yourself. As Above, So Below!
It is irrelevant who I am, the only thing that really matters is what I do.
I dedicated my entire life to research and studied esoteric sciences.
The Tarot is the crossroad, the melting pot of all the other esoteric sciences.
The Tarot, Kabbalah, Alchemy are all share the common foundation of Astrology and Numerology.
Cannot learn and understand one without learning and understanding the others. Just like in the universe, everything is connected.
I created not only a Tarot deck, but I found the fundamental connection between all the branches of the esoteric sciences and based on the relationship between energy and matter, I find a simple formula which explains this connection.
I offer a reasonable new perspective on Astrology and Numerology – all integrated within the Tarot deck.
I discovered many inexactitudes and inconsistencies within these esoteric sciences, and I proposed a couple of corrections. People do not like changes – people resist changes. People are afraid of anything new and the unknown, they always prefer “the Devil they know”. We consider some things facts only because they do not suffer any changes for hundreds or thousands of years. As A.E. Waite noticed, people copied, in good faith, from one another things without raising any question, without checking and sometimes without understanding those things. They learn mechanically things they do not really understand, but only memorise them and then, they consider they know them. However, they do not.
I not only studied esotericism, but I also widened my interest to Astronomy, Geometry, Physics and Metaphysics, History, Cosmology, Psychology, many other “things”, and always one question lead me to another and another one.
A crucial part of my work was the “meeting” with P.D. Ouspensky’s “In search of Miraculous” and the discovery of G.I. Gurdjieff’s teaching. In the good old days, mostly in the small communities, someone was known, recognised due to her/his parents. Similarly, in esoteric circles a disciple is recognised through her/his master: “tell me who your master is, and I tell you who you are”.
Sometimes people ask me why Gurdjieff’s teaching is unknown and how it never made it to a broader audience, respectively it was so brutally misinterpreted by some of his followers?
First of all, Gurdjieff’s teaching is unpopular because put the responsibility back on the individual. This is not something that people accept readily. It is much easier to think that “Jesus” died for our sins, “Jesus” did do and will do the heavy lifting and at the end, we will be only witnesses of our own salvation. Sorry folks, but evolution and spiritual development do not work like this. Evolution is against nature; it takes a super-effort, conscious work and perseverance. Nobody will make this effort instead of you. However, someone may offer you “good” or “bad” guidance. On the other hand, people tend to mistaken progress to evolution. Mainly the technological progress for evolution. Although the humankind made giant steps regarding technological progress, on the spiritual level, we are on a dangerous curve of regress.
Secondly, changing mentalities is tough. People like to chat about changes, but they reject actual changes. Subconsciously there is a fabulous resistance to change. It is hard to change the way of thinking of one single person, very difficult to change it for a group of people and impossible for the entire humanity. For thousands of years, humans believed that the Earth is flat and it is at the centre of the universe. People questioning these ‘facts’ were burnt on the stake. Giordano Bruno for instance. And that happened not 1000 but only 400 years ago! Not surprisingly, there are people, some of them educated ones, who still believe that the Earth is flat. And you can not argue with someone’s belief because belief is exclusively an emotional choice, and cannot reason with emotions.
I am sort of Don Quixote of the modern esoteric scene.
Fortunately, people can kill people, but can not kill the ideas. And ideas are like seeds and continue to grow.
Interestingly, we are educated, cultivated to “think” emotionally, and for that matter, we are so easy to be manipulated – kept in ‘the dark’.
We are prisoners of the dualistic model created thousands of years ago. In my opinion, the patriarchal, monotheist, monogamous, antagonistic dualistic model, is false and harmful. That model set the humanity on the wrong path, and it is very difficult to get out from it. However, eventually, we will have to free ourselves. We will have to do it because nobody will do it instead of us.
Gurdjieff was a mixture of Armenian and Greek descents. First, he tried to found followers in Russia, then in Europe and the United States. He was the very definition of an outsider, and his ideas were even more strange than his origin. However, for that matter, he was never fully accepted, not by the Russians, not by the Europeans and not by the Americans. He never spoke Russian perfectly and far as I know, he never knew French or English.
My story is not fundamentally different. I am Hungarian, born in Romania under the communist regime of Nicolae Ceausescu. Hungarians and Romanians hate each other just like Germans and French, Turks and Greeks, Arabs and Jews, and so on.
I am left-handed. Some of my teachers tied my left hand to force me to use my right hand. Others hit my fingertips with a wooden ruler. Nothing worked, and I am still left-handed.
In school, I only learned Latin and Russian as a foreign language; I know some Latin, but only a few words in Russian.
I had big ears and even a much bigger mouth.
However, I learned English listening to my mom’s Beatles albums, later from movies and by reading thousands of books. I started with Shakespeare, Hemingway and Stephen King, then continued with Aleister Crowley and other esoteric writings. Fortunately, my English is a little bit better or, at least, I hope it is.
When disco and pop music was popular, I prefer rock music. When most of my friends listen to hard rock, I was listening to heavy metal. When heavy metal became popular, I switched to punk rock. I love industrial music, and I love jazz. I loved Guns’N’Roses just as much as I loved Alice In Chains, Sex Pistols, Nine Inch Nails, Frank Zappa and Miles Davis. I played in a couple of bands, and I am still writing and playing ‘odd’ music.
I know everything about discrimination because I was always on the ‘wrong side of the wall’. These were my choices, and I was never looking for the easy way. The beaten path always leads to the same results, and I was always looking for a different outcome.
Most of the times I was everybody and my own worst enemy.
I was never fully accepted nor by the Hungarians, nor by the Romanians because I tried to make friends on both sides. For the rest of the world, most probably, I’m just another, not trustworthy, East-Europe weirdo.
People are scared of me not because who I am, but because what I know. They hate me and attack me not because what I know, but because what they do not know.
Then again, just as I said in the beginning, it is irrelevant who I was, who I am or from where I come from, the only thing that matters is what I do, and what is my legacy. I do not want to keep all that knowledge for myself, but I am going to share it with you.